Living in Erotically Inclusive Community

It astounds and shocks me how callously and flippantly we treat needs for touch, connection, intimacy, and erotic and sexual gratification in wider society.

I believe that it is dangerous to flagrantly allow or even prohibit people from meeting their sexual needs–as our society does.

All sorts of ‘industries’ have sprung up (no pun intended) to fill this need. The desires catered to by them are so powerful that no legal inducement or punishment has ever eradicated them.

An erotically-inclusive community is one in which the participants agree to meet or help meet each other’s erotic, touch, and sexual needs as part of community living.

If you choose to live with someone [or someones] and you love them, you want their needs to be met: food, clothing, shelter at least. You want them to be happy. Right?

Where does that stop?

You know about Maslow’s Hierarchy or needs, right?

The theory is that lower needs on the pyramid (like food) must be fulfilled before higher needs (like creativity) can be.

Guess where sex is on the pyramid?

At the very bottom. Along with food, sleep, air, water.

Is sex really that important? Is it true that we can’t get our higher-level needs met if our need for sex isn’t fulfilled? Is that really what Maslow meant when he made the pyramid?

Judging by all the crazy, sometimes horrible things we do in this world just to get sexual pleasure and expression, I think it just might be.


I saw a community that took this seriously once in my life. Morehouse. There, I understood that they used a framework and rules for safely meeting needs for touch, intimacy, and sexuality (and rules around these things) so that the community and its members would achieve it’s highest potential.

I hope to live in or create something similar soon.

What do you think? Is erotically inclusive community desirable or possible? Why or why not?

If you’d like to meet more of your needs around relating, sexuality, and intimacy regardless of your current community, contact me on the contact page!



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