Category Archives: Mentoring

A Solution to the Problem of Service

Like many people who want to serve others, I have been faced with what seemed an impossible dilemma:

  1. The value of my personal time and services increases as I gain experience, wisdom, knowledge, and understanding.
  2. I have a deep desire to help *everyone*.
  3. I need to provide for myself.
  4. I want to help ever-more people.
  5. A personal issue: I am very “intense”. Working with me can be like drinking from a firehose.

In addition, I faced the other issues people in my role do:

  1. How do I keep growing and learning when I need to market and deliver my services constantly?
  2. How do I deal with people who don’t show up, keep their commitments or don’t [want to] pay?
  3. Even if I am successful, how do avoid burnout and have adequate time for myself?

I did what many healers, teachers, coaches, etc. who are outside the mainstream do:

  1. I worked for free. I believe in serving and giving back. But, in our world, working for free doesn’t work long-term. Not only do I then have few resources to meet my needs and take care of myself, people often do not value things which require no investment. (Violated #3)
  2. I became “exclusive”.  (Violated #2)
  3. I burned out and wanted to withdraw (#2 again).

…and I followed many permutations of all of those over about four years. Nothing worked or satisfied my requirements.

In addition, here are the problems for people seeking personal help with life, sex, relationships, business, health, etc:

  1. There is a ton of information out there. But how do I apply it?
  2. Whose information is correct?
  3. I can’t see what I ‘can’t see’ because I don’t see it.  My programming makes me ‘blind’ to the useful parts of the information I do find. How do I see it?
  4. Who do I trust for 1:1 support? They want huge investments. What if I choose someone who can’t help? Or if we’re just not a fit? And I’ve already paid 5, 50, or 500k dollars?
  5. In addition, those ‘programs’ have strict rules and enforcement about time, duration…what if I get sick or injured or need to take a break for any other reason? Do I lose that massive investment? That I paid in advance? Do I quit? Do I sue?

It’s no wonder that people feel stuck.

I finally figured it out. For both sides.

I figured out a way for anyone to get personal support from me with virtually anything they want to change about life.

So, how do I help as many people as possible personally and deeply with very challenging issues that I am perhaps the best person to solve without becoming burned out?

To do so, I had to uncouple my understanding of time.

The popular thinking goes: Either I am staring you in the face helping you (and that’s very expensive), or I hand you prepackaged information (cheaper) and say, “Go for it! Bye!”. I don’t like ‘selling information’. Statistics indicate that around  5% of people can implement “naked information” without support. I don’t like the thought of only 5% of people solving the problem they came to me to solve.

I’d love to work 20 hours a week with every person who wants my time. But there is only one of me.

Dilemma indeed.

It turns out that, thanks to the magical invention called the Internet, I can personally coach hundreds of people a month–perhaps thousands, as long as I do this one thing.

What is this thing?

I disconnect their issues and questions from my immediate response.

I have up times and down times. I have high energy times and less high-energy times. I have times when I am busy. I have times when I am free.

So, I needed to find a way to work effectively in my high-energy, free times to give everyone the best possible support and experience.

In addition, I have created many programs that do provide information that will get people 80% of the way there with most issues they are facing. But left alone with it, life gets in the way, we get distracted. You know how it is.

So, here’s what I do.

I chopped my current hourly rate ($1000) down into tiny segments.

In fact, the smallest segment is now just 90 seconds. So you can buy 1.5 minutes of my personal attention and support.

Per month.

Wait!“, you say, “That sounds useless! What can you possibly help me with in 90 seconds?”

Here’s where it gets cool.

I have written hundreds of articles and made dozens of videos and audio files and explaining all about relationships, sexuality, connection, intimacy, business, energetics, and lots more. And, I have all sorts of practices that I have learned, created, adapted, and applied to myself for higher and greater results.

They are all over the internet and all over the many sites I have created through the years.

If you ask me your specific question, chances are, I have already answered it in depth many times. In which case, it takes me about 30 seconds to find that thing and shoot it to you.

60 seconds left.

Now, you read it. You try it. You have another question. So you ask.

And, when I have time, generally in about 48 hours, you get another answer. I give you something to try out. And you try it out. Again, 30 seconds. You still have coaching time left!

But because we did it asynchronously (not in direct contact), my time was used to full efficiency. And you were helped to do the things that are going to improve your life at minimal cost. Not just read about them. Not just think about them. But do something

This system won’t work if you don’t want to do anything or expect me to do things for you.  I can’t do your push-ups.

But, if you are willing to take some cutting-edge tried-and-true ideas and actually apply them, you will see results. And get all your questions answered.

If you enjoy the process and our interaction, continue.

If you want to work faster on more challenging and esoteric issues, you can simply go up a level in the system to get more time with me.

What if,” you ask, “I ask you something really hard you’ve never heard before?”

Awesome! I take a few hours to think, research, maybe interview someone and come up with another article, video, or podcast.

I put that content into the public or on the level of my membership system you have already paid for, and you have a quality, powerful answer. You will get that link. If you have more questions, we just go back into the process.

And you don’t pay any more for that.

Every question is welcome.

So you think you can actually help me change my life in 90 seconds a month?”

Yup.

I have been devoted full-time to personal development since 2008.  Few people have spent that time in the field. I’ve worked with hundreds of people. I’ve seen what works and what doesn’t.

And I’ve seen enough eyes glaze over when I get ‘in the zone’ to know the importance of giving bite-sized action steps and enough time to do them.

I can keep probably 95% of people who want to work with me busy and happy with their progress with just a minute or two a month.

Progress takes practice.

It’s hard work.

It’s knowing where to put that effort that is important. But you have to do it.

If you don’t find this system is helping you reach your goals, that’s fine. We shake hands and move on, digitally speaking 🙂 There is no commitment. I don’t lock you in. You can take breaks and vacations and come back [as long as spots are free]. It’s completely flexible.

There’s another thing I’ve created to help you, though.

I put you together in groups of 3 with people who are facing a similar challenges. I call each group a “Triumph”.

You will meet with your Triumph every week and be able to track your progress, get support, and be accountable to one another.

You will find that, often, your Triumph will have answers (or tease out the answers already inside of you) and that keep you moving forward.

If not, you are welcome to ask me any question and it works just like I wrote above.

In summary:

  • Weekly small-group meetings.
  • Personal support from me.
  • Extremely low investment.
  • A massive amount of content.
  • No long-term commitment.

It’s taken me four years to design this, and it is constantly improving.

Another question:

What if you don’t ask me anything?

Then, you still get access to everyone else’s questions and my answers, all my programs, all my new content…which is more than enough to help you make progress toward your relationship, professional, and other life goals.

I imagine many people will make great progress just with the Triumph and free content.

Ok, sure,” you ask, “But what if I have NO money? Then I have NO way to participate!”

Great question!

As long as you have internet access (which you can get for free at any public library), you can access all of my (constantly updating) content about the basics in life to support yourself in shifting in ways to meet not only your basic needs, but also to be able to invest in yourself.

I’ve had people use a few of my free ideas and massively increase their income in a very short time.

One more question:

What if I want to work with you 1:1 personally face-to-face or over the internet?”

It’s possible. I have an application you can fill out, we will discuss it briefly and decide how to move forward.

This makes me happy.

I finally have a way to help anyone get what they want in their lives, no matter the budget, time they are willing to invest, or goal.

I’m very proud of this.

This is rolling out in a bigger way right now. I already have taken a few ‘test students’ and the initial results have blown me away.

I’d love to have you participate.

To get more information, sign up for my newsletter on the right side of this site, or contact me through the contact page, and I’ll send you information about how to access each level.

Payment is handled by a responsible third party payment and subscription system–you pay them and they pay me each month. You can talk to them about any technical financial questions.

This is so *&^%$#@ fun.

I look forward to helping you move forward in your own development.

All my love,
Ryan Orrock

FAQ

Q: How do you keep track of the time you have spent with me?
A: The system tracks it for me. If I feel like we aren’t synched on expectations, I’ll tell you and we’ll work it out.

Q: Yeah, but you can’t work with an infinite number of people. At some time your time will run out, right?
A: Yes. This is true. I have set limits for every level to manage my energy levels. Once a program level is full, it won’t accept any new clients until others complete. This is all managed automatically.

 

What’s wrong with [conscious] business in 2017?

Most business programs, even those for ‘conscious entrepreneurs’ ignore and *pull us out of* our own energy.

I’ve been looking for something that ‘feels right’ for me as a group or online process for years, but have never found it.

Business, in the US, is all quite masculine. Even in our world.

Pushing, forcing, fighting…war metaphors and the constant pressure to ‘penetrate the market’ and conquer is simply…exhausting.

If I acquiesce to that energy for my work, I lose my center.

It, unfortunately, also hooked many of my own neuroses.

HURRY! HURRY! HURRY!

No.

What if it was ok if it took 5 months? Or 5 years?

What if I could surrender to the more organic, balanced development of harmonized masculine and feminine energy? And get where I want to go?

It makes no sense to make lots of money and have burnt out adrenals, emotional collapse, and even contemplate ending it all–when the world and our peers are telling me ‘I have made it’.

I believe business will completely transform in the next few years. Just like all of society.

It’s going to move back into equilibrium.

It’s not going to sacrifice life for the goal of ‘success’.

While the rest of the world has been “zigging”, I have been “zagging”. Both internally and externally.

The result, at least from a professional point of view, is a new relaxed system for support and mastery professionally.

It feels so much better and a few people have already tried it along with myself.

If you have ever wanted more support [from me] and wondered how to do it…now I have a place for you. Come and see.

Here’s the link

Looking forward to you.

Partner with Ryan for Your Success

I love to work with people 1:1.

I have a one-on-one program that I offer to just a few people at a time.

I have studied and practiced methods and systems behind coaching, mentoring, therapy, healing, bodywork, mind-work, counseling, training, teaching, professional supervision, energy work, spiritual support, BDSM, tantra, logic, meditation, productivity, time management, sales, marketing, finance, and business.

My work consists of all of that and just being plain ole’ me.

Your journey of growth is your journey of growth. I recommend that you choose people to accompany you on that journey that will make it more enjoyable and efficient.

If you want to dip your toe in with me, I recommend one of my month-to-month programs.

If you want a deep introduction to yourself, this program is something to consider. It will probably be your most intensive adventure to date:

  • The total investment of $200k is payable in advance for 200h of one-on-one time over a maximum of 4 years.
  • I expect you to bring trust, commitment, and surrender and also to bring goals worthy of this time and investment.

What you get from me:

  • A cheerleader who is probably more excited about your success than you  are
  • A connection that will give you structures and modeling for everyone you work and interact with
  • Clarity and vision
  • A vertical path up the personal growth curve
  • A chance to find out who you really are
  • An opportunity to explore parts of yourself you haven’t
The program is also:
  • Very flexible. Need 4 hours this week? No problem. Want a weekend? We can do that. Take a couple months off to integrate? Sure.
  • Deep enough. The work can be destabilizing. I have accepted that there is no ‘easy way’.  The commitment is deep enough and long enough to make sure you can ground what you learn over time.
  • It doesn’t matter we work over the phone or Skype or in person or even over messenger. I’ve learned to be powerfully supportive in each of these mediums. We can schedule the particular mix of these that works best for you.

If you are interested, contact me and I will send you an application.

 

 

 

 

An Open Letter to Energetically Gifted Millenials

Dear Energetically Gifted, Empathic, and/or Highly Sensitive Millennial,

I get where you come from. I hear the stories over and over. Life has been tough. Very tough. You might have been born into a tough family. You might have had serious abuse there.

Even if that wasn’t the case, you were not understood by your family or peer group. You hung around older people. You had weird interests.

Often, what you saw, heard, felt, did–who you were–instead of garnering praise, got you punished. Talk about a onslaught to your abilities!

Talk about dishonor for your gifts! Insult to your very being.

I’m sorry. They didn’t know what to do with you.

The truth is: you are different. You feel things no one else seems to. You sense and know things others don’t. You don’t fit in.

I get it. I’ve been there.

I know the rage that comes from not being understood–both how I feel and what I think. And how that seeming disregard for who I am made me wonder which of us had to disappear–the others or me–for me to be happy.

It’s no joyful place to be. The frustration, pain, and sadness can be overwhelming.

Whether people are telling us that we are special or weird, they just don’t seem to get it.

The temptation is there to reject ‘the old ways’–your family, their traditions…that life and world that hasn’t treated you how you obviously deserve to be treated.

You feel like an alien. Like you’re in the wrong place. Like you just don’t belong and never could.

The good news is, you aren’t in the wrong place. You are not just in the right place, you are in the perfect place. The world is still catching up to you, however. And that’s happening faster all the time.

In fact, you will fashion the world to be as you see it could be.

But that will be no simple journey.

Your challenges and difficulties are there precisely to teach you things that you could not have learned any other way. To strengthen you in ways that nothing else could have. Someday,  you can feel as much gratitude for them as you might rage and devastation now.

Yes. You are wise. Yes. You are powerful. Yes, you have been misunderstood.

But you are not alone. Not totally.

Although your generation may have more seers and prophets/esses, more miraculous and magical people, we have always been there.

Many of us were once at the age you are now. It’s true: some of us abandoned our gifts and hid them out of self-preservation. But some of us also have accepted and began to apply them to bless others and enjoy who we are.

I remember having my first transcendent experience. In that moment, I knew everything. Any question I asked was answered. I felt invincible.

I knew I was complete in myself and didn’t need anything or anyone else.

And yet, I was still in a world of people. I wanted to go live on a mountain top. But my deepest truth told me not to withdraw.

I lived in the world and ‘plied my trade’–vowing never again to waste my time or valuable life energy doing things I didn’t want to do for the illogical and destructive monster that so much of society had become for me.

After struggling along for awhile in my newfound ‘omniscience’,  there were nagging issues in my life that I still couldn’t seem to resolve–my health, my challenging relationships, and my finances. I finally had to admit: knowing ‘everything’ is sometimes not enough.

There were many questions I didn’t even know to ask in order to exist in this world and enjoy it as I believed I could and should.

And so I did something that is quite challenging for someone who feels they know everything.

I asked for help.

I began receiving coaching, mentoring and support from my elders, those more practiced than I was, and those who just plain had experience in things I did not. Both about the topics at hand and also in how to be in this world.

And, I was surprised about how much I wasn’t seeing…how much I benefited from that support. And how much psychological work was still to be done, on top of all the spiritual work I had been dedicated to for over a decade.

Sometimes, when I see someone like you, I think of me then: seeing and feeling so much and yet feeling so undervalued, unappreciated, unaccepted, and even helpless.

And then I wish I could tell you what I wish I had known back then.

What do I wish I knew?

  • I needed someone who could see and feel me just as much as I feel and saw everyone else.
    Despite my empathic gifts, I was out of touch with my own feelings.  They didn’t feel welcome growing up, so I had buried and lost them. I needed someone like me to help me see and identify what I was feeling, tell me what I was thinking was ok, and help me develop my gifts. My psyche and relating had to catch up with my energetic and spiritual.
  • I’m perfect just the way I am. There is nothing ‘wrong’ with how I was created or what I want and need. For this reason, I don’t need to hide myself or be ashamed.
  • I’m an important piece to the puzzle of this world.
    I’m not an ‘alien’. There is space for me here. Not only can I be tolerated, but my gifts are powerfully needed in this world. It may take us a little more time and effort than most people to find where we fit in and how we can contribute–and have that contribution be valued–but it is there, and we are important and valuable to others.
  • Many things do take time. Be patient.
    I was used to straight A’s without any studying. But there never seemed to be anyone who had time enough or interest enough to listen to all I had to say.
    I felt pressure. I rushed. I needed to hurry.
    But, even when I rushed, some things I couldn’t learn or perfect in an evening, a weekend, or even a month.
    I had to go back to those things I hurried through over and over and over again and put in the time, practice, and effort to really understand and perfect them.
    This included virtually my entire childhood.
    Along the way, I learned that there is enough time.

I have dreamed about the perfect Professor X School for Gifted Young People. Some of us are working on it.

In the mean time, know that:

  • You are not alone.
  • Many are willing to support you.
  • There are many who get you–much better than you may have ever experienced.
  • There is enough time. We don’t need to rush.

You have massive skills and abilities. The greater they are, the longer they may take to practice. To hone. To perfect. And to be able to present in a way that the world can accept and you can benefit from them as well.

I’m happy you are here. We need you. Never give up. Keep going. It will get better. You will get through it. Look for people who can help you and you will find them.

We are changing things and it is awesometastic.

Greatest blessings be with you on your journey.

Ryan Orrock

 

What I “See”

EnergyI have really been cautious about those “weirdos” like tarot readers, astrologists, numerologists, and so on for pretty much, well, ever.

Until it dawned on me I *was* one of those weirdos.

When I went to my first John Hawken 1 tantra training week, he gathered everyone into groups of ten, asked one person to stand in the middle and everyone else to tell that person what they saw, physically and energetically.

Then he commented on every person as well.

I was mystified. He took one look at you and told you about your parents, your emotional patterns, your current life situation, how you usually solve problems, (and how that wasn’t working) and what your current areas of growth were.

He did all this without you saying anything.

How did he do this? He was reading (and interpreting) two things that I didn’t know existed up to that point.

#1: Energy

#2: Body structure a la Wilhelm Reich

When I saw him do that–and be pretty much right on the money–as just about everyone agreed with him 2–I said, “I want to learn to do that.”

So, I spent the next three years following him and cultivating these abilities. 3

I had a ‘knack’ for it. And eventually, I was able to see the same things.

But, for some weird reason, it took me a long time to let people know that.

Maybe it was because it was too ‘woo-woo’, weird, or ‘out there’?

Perhaps because I am super conscious of all the hucksters and con men (and women) who prey on others, claiming ‘esoteric knowledge’.

But the fact is, these types of things are very accepted by numerous cultures who are a hell of a lot happier and healthier than we are. They have names for energy – “chi, prana, ki”. And they have scientifically-proven systems of moving and balancing the energy (acupressure, acupuncture) that really heal things.

And, the further I go down the rabbit-hole, the more these things are screaming at me with every deeper encounter. So it became the elephant in the room.

Some people can see tumors or interior lesions. My particular specialty is seeing relationship and, ‘life energy’ patterns.

Meaning, I get information about the questions:

  • “How are you living and moving in your life, and how is that affecting your emotions and well-being?” and
  • “How are your interactions with some other person (usually spouse or long-term partner) affecting your life energy and the results you get in the world?”

Imagine it like the Ghost of Christmas Future coming to you and saying, “If you don’t change your ways, you will end up where you’re going! (like Marley)”. Sometimes it’s like that.

Which, I suppose, is why I gravitated to a teacher who had a similar gift and talent.

Once I began to see more and more clearly, 4 I discovered and began implementing the other two ‘parts’ of my gift.

Which were: verbalizing and describing what I saw and ‘moving’ the energy (or providing exercises to move the energy) to get different results in health, relationships, money, or whatever.

I’ll write about those both in other articles.

  1. The first time I met him, the first sentence out of his mouth was, “You are a point of consciousness and a flow of energy.” And I was captivated. Something deep inside me said, “This is what you have been looking for your whole life.” More on this in other articles.
  2. And even if they didn’t, the other people in the group said, “Oh yeah, you’re TOTALLY like that!”
  3. As well as dealing with my own shame, guilt, fear, and beliefs around sexuality and pleasure AND learning the conceptual frameworks of people like Reich who used to map this stuff
  4. actually, this gift had been with me since I was a teen who friends came to for relationship advice